Disappointing City

In this blog post i’m going to talk about the negative and positive things in my trip to Naples. My family and I spent one month in the city of Naples back in the summer of 2013. We went into the city with bigger expectations than we should have. I thought of the city as a lovely tourist city. Oh well.

The city was all really dirty, big rats ran around even the rich part of the city. I could only imagine what it was like in the poor part of the city. I can’t forget the smell of the city, it was like spoiled food!

The city itself was a real disaster, luckily we didn’t travel all the way there to see the city, instead we traveled there to see sights like Pompeii and the famous volcano Vesuvius. A warning to people going to visit Vesuvius, you don’t want to go there in the morning because it’s going be hot. Instead go there after about 3pm.

The city was a mess, but the people in the city didn’t behave rudely or anything, mostly just people minding their own business.

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  1. #1 by Mrs. Puhakka on January 29, 2015 - 9:30 am

    Contents: Satisfactory
    Never introduce an essay by explaining what you are about to do, JUST GET TO IT. This is called a topic sentence, “My trip to Naples in 2013 was a disaster.” You never discuss the positive aspect, so why do you say so in the first paragraph? If you thought the people were wonderful, you should have dedicated a whole paragraph to them for balance (On the other hand, the people in Naples were…) A messy structure – aim higher!

    You use your senses of smell and sight very well in the second paragraph!

    Media: Room for improvement

    Grammar: Very good
    – i = I
    – really dirty = FILTHY

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